I Hate Viruses! (Viri?)

Our computer has been seized with some kind of ad-ware virus. It slows the whole thing down, because there are constantly ads coming through. They are mostly for things I would never think about purchasing.

No, I do not want to meet 22-year-old Amber in Frisco.

No, I do not want to try Pro-Activ.

No, I am not looking for a transsexual.

Nor do I want to subscribe to a webcam (which seems to be stuck on the 24-hour boob channel).

Where are the good ads?

Click here for a free glass of lemonade!

Sniff here and smell your favorite flower!

Subscribe here to enjoy a motivational story every morning, hand-delivered to you in bed by a hot Puerto Rican pool boy wearing a... [deleted]

Gotta go.